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Dear Amelia,

There’s more to the story, yes. Macey didn’t show me everything at once. When she showed me the first part, I was angry. But not at Devyn. Devyn was beyond drunk, but he still saved me multiple times that night. And he drove me home. But like I said, there was more to the story.

Macey couldn’t forgive Devyn. She blamed him for what happened during and after the party. She told me she had to save me because I tried to end my life several times after the party. And the bullying didn’t stop. Even after what happened, everyone pretended it didn’t. They got away with it. To Macey, Devyn was at fault. And she hated him. She didn’t understand why I didn’t. She didn’t understand how I could still fall for him. How I could still love him.

Don’t get me wrong, I was mad at these new memories. I was mad that Macey kept them from me. I was mad she was haunted by them. I was mad that I put myself in that position in the first place. I knew who would be there. And I knew how they treated me every chance they got. And I still went.

Macey didn’t take all my memories, just the extreme ones that I allowed her to take. Still, there were so many she had that I didn’t.

Devyn did apologize. He called and texted everyday. He came to my house many times to say sorry. But Macey was in control at that time. For while actually. And Macey told him I wanted nothing to do with him. That hurt me because Devyn was not the monster she thought he was. Deep down, I think she knew that. If she didn’t, she would have killed him. She had plenty of opportunities to.

Macey was broken, and hurt. She yelled that she couldn’t understand me. She cried, and as she did, I shared good memories with her. The ones she didn’t get to experience herself.

Together, we cried, and held each other. As much as Macey hated Devyn, she admitted that she loved him too. And then we heard his voice. Macey told me that if we were hearing him, it mean that the seal was weakening. What we heard, was him apologizing for that night.

Macey and I woke up together. I told Devyn I forgave him. He also didn’t remember everything that happened because he blacked out. Like I said, he was extremely drunk the whole night. He didn’t know that he saved me. So I showed him the memories that Macey gave back to me. He carried so much guilt for so long because of that night. All I wanted was for all of us to let go and move on. But the damage was done, Jordan didn’t trust him anymore.

Stella and Farrah showed up and sealed me before I could tell them I was in control of myself again. However, I didn’t mind. Macey gave me the rest of my memories back. In turn, I shared all of my good memories. All of them. And then, we looked for Gaia.

Gaia found us first. She was with Tristan. He dream walked into my mind, and he accepted Macey with open arms. No one could get through to her, not even me. But Tristan did. He listened to her, asked her questions, and told her he loved her. When he hugged her, she broke down.

Maybe it was his innocence and pureness that melted her walls of ice. But she gave in. Because she loved him, and she wanted to protect him. Tristan was the reason Macey was willing to try. And we became one again. I was whole again. With all the good and bad memories. And with Gaia. All I needed to do was wake up.

~Mom

MJ. B