Give Me Grace

Chapter 5

Part One

We made it to the hotel pretty quickly since the roads were empty. When we first got to town yesterday, we only planned on staying one night and then sleeping at the house. But since everything seemed to be more complicated than we originally planned, we had to extend our stay. At least until we could get running water and AC again.

“That’s crazy. So in the end, he was a good father? I wonder if Gramps sent him to rehab.”

“He was never a good father. But you’re most likely right about rehab. Grandpa was always giving second chances. Even to those who didn’t deserve it.”

Miles grabbed our things from the truck as I held the hotel door for him. Our room was on the fourth floor and I was so tired, I didn’t think I could make it. As much as I wanted to take a nice hot shower, the bed was calling my name. 

“Any idea what you want to eat?” Miles gingerly asked as the elevator ascended to the fourth floor.

“I just want to sleep. I can’t even think about food right now,” I groaned as my stomach betrayed me.

“I’ll order something online. Does Chinese food sound good?”

I just nodded as we made our way down the hall and towards our room. The moment my face hit the bed, I felt myself drifting off. Though it was hard to sleep with all the noise Miles was making. He must have been looking for his wallet, which I’m sure he left in the truck.

“Here. Take my card.” I pulled my credit card out of my back pocket and held it out for him to take.

“Thanks. It should be here in twenty minutes. Let’s get you washed up.”

I groaned again because all I wanted to do was rest. I know that was gross and that I was acting like a child. But I wore myself out. Between separating garbage from donatable and sellable items, to moving large furniture, and cleaning the house in almost ninety-degree weather. I was drained. But the sound of the shower running did make me want to stand under the water.

“Come on. I’ll help you wash up.”

True to his word, Miles helped me get clean as I enjoyed the relaxing water on my aching muscles. By the time we were finished and dressed, there was a knock on the door with the food. The shower had given me my energy back and was eager to devour my food.

“So something you mentioned twice now, was that your dad was hooking up with your aunt? Like on multiple occasions? How did your mom find out?”

***

Shortly after my dad got out of jail and moved into the apartment with us, my mom took us to our aunt’s house. She didn’t trust our dad to watch us since he was always high or drunk. My mom normally had the weekends off so she could take care of us, but since my dad came back, she picked up a few extra shifts.

My aunt wasn’t a caring person and didn’t like to have us around. She hated kids and wanted nothing to do with us. But since my mom agreed to pay her, she accepted. So off we went.

About two hours before my mom was supposed to pick us up, my dad showed up. He told my aunt that she sent him. My aunt was skeptical because my mom clearly told her that she would come to pick us up. But my dad insisted.

I don’t know what they were talking about, but they told us to play outside while they had a “grown-up” conversation. We did as we were told but they were gone for a while. Then my mom showed up earlier than expected. She was knocking on the door, but we didn’t hear it because we were out in the backyard.

When she came through the gate in the backyard, we were all confused. She asked us where our aunt was and we told her she was inside having a “grown-up” conversation with our dad. My mom seemed confused but then, in the moment of quietness, we heard the sounds of moaning and grunting and her face contorted to that of anger.

My mom told us to stay outside and she stormed into the house. Moments later we heard yelling and screaming. There were thuds and it scared us. After a while, my mom came storming out as my dad followed her, only half dressed.

There was blood running down my mom’s nose and she had a bruise on her brow. Her hair was rustled like she had just got out of bed, and she was crying. We all ran to her, trying to comfort her when my dad came out crying and apologizing.

He was trying to put on a front for my siblings. They believed he could do no wrong, but I knew the truth. He kept telling my mom that he needed to give her a bandaid and disinfect her wounds, but she just kept pushing him away and telling us to get in the car.

My aunt also came downstairs in just a robe, her hair was also messed up and she was bleeding as well on her face. She cursed my mom and told us to get out.

“Get the fuck out! I don’t ever want to see you or your kids again! I was being nice trying to help you and this is how you repay me?” My aunt yelled at the top of her lungs.

“You shameless, desperate bitch! You will never see my kids again!” My mom yelled back at her.

“I don’t want to see your stupid kids!” My aunt spat as she looked at us in disgust.

“I hate you!” My mom shouted.

“Oh boo-hoo. Cry me a river. I don’t give two shits.” My aunt snorts as she lights a cigarette. “Take your little dog too,” she points at my dad who glares at her.

“You want to sleep with him? Then keep him. I don’t want him,” my mom said as she opened the door to the driver’s seat of the car.

 “Oh, come on. He’s fucked his way through the city. Everyone has had a taste of his dick. Why are you dumping him on me?”

My mom didn’t say anything, she just looked hurt. My dad scrambled to get to the car but my mom locked the doors on him. 

“Don’t be like that, Sis. Just take him back like you always do. It’s nothing new. No need to change up and have standards now.” My aunt took a large drag of her cigarette then tossed it on the ground and stepped on it before turning to walk back inside.

“Well, you might want to get yourself checked out. Last time, he gave me chlamydia. I wouldn’t be surprised if he gave you something worse.” My mom spat before getting into the car.

We drove off, leaving my dad standing on the side of the street. It was the last time we saw our aunt. But it wasn’t the last time we heard our parents arguing about her.

When we went to live with Mr. Bates, oftentimes, when my dad would leave to “find work”, my mom would later find that he was seeing my aunt and they argued about it. Even after a few years, my mom would find out about his adulterous ways, many times they were with my aunt. 

It seemed as though she grew accustomed to it. Numbed to the pain of my father’s infidelities and abuse. And although he seemed to change after Mr. Bates sent him away, I couldn’t trust him. And I didn’t understand how my mother and siblings could.

***